Bullets and Bunnies – Sick and Tired Edition

19 Aug
  • 38 weeks tomorrow.  I was seriously hoping she’d be out by now. I know that doesn’t usually happen but I figured with the de-stitching and all, we’d have a good jump start on getting things moving.
  • The fit-ball has been taken out, long walks have been initiated. Other than both of those things making me want to pee ALL THE TIME, no huge difference yet.  Though I do think I MAY have lost my mucus plug yesterday. But that can happen waaay before labor kicks in. Le sigh.
  • My mom is CONVINCED I’m going to give birth on her birthday. That’s this Wednesday. I highly doubt she’s right. Trying not to get my hopes up. It’s not like the woman has psychic powers. For the record, I’ll take Thursday or Friday just as happily. Tuesday would be even better. Just sayin’.
  • My anxiety has been through the roof. I’m no longer counting kicks 3 times a day, I’m counting them ALL DAY. With the exception of the occasional rare distraction, it seems like all I’ve been doing lately is focusing on whether she’s moving enough. This is not a fun place to be.
  • The anxiety isn’t just around counting kicks. It’s around everything. Giving birth, what happens if anything goes wrong, what happens if everything goes right (just as scary to me for some reason). How I’ll react to certain triggers, whether I’ll be able to keep my cool. It’s just everything. I’m a hormonal mess. By the time Shmerson comes home each night he usually finds me sitting on the couch crying. Good times all around.
  • When Shmerson goes to bed, he usually kisses my stomach and says “good night”. The last couple of days he’s been kissing it and saying “get out”. Hear hear!
  • I think the best way to describe my overall mood at this point is just sick and tired. Sick and tired of the same daily routine. Sick and tired of eating the same effing thing every day. Sick and tired of work. Sick and tired of running over every possible scenario in my head over and over again. Sick and tired of the anxiety. Sick and tired of “what if”.
  • I happened to see the Russian while waiting for my high-risk OB appointment last week.  I told him that he did too good a job with my cerclage. He laughed and said “at this rate, you’ll go to 42 weeks”. Not funny Russian. NOT FUNNY.
  • I can haz labor now?
  • No, seriously. Poopik is not amused.
  • At least you can haz a bunny:


17 Responses to “Bullets and Bunnies – Sick and Tired Edition”

  1. Yael August 19, 2013 at 14:30 #

    Hang in there! You are almost there.
    Your mom could be right. I had 2 dreams about being in labor, one it was the 28th and one it was during a snowstorm. Both were right. I labored on the 28th of the Hebrew month and it was during a snowstorm – very odd.. my mom dreamed she met my baby before he was born and he had a name with similar meaning to what we gave him, and that he would arrive before her visit, which he did..

  2. Kathryn August 19, 2013 at 15:08 #

    So So So Close. Even if you go to 42 weeks (which you won’t), you won’t be pregnant forever. Somehow, the baby comes out. I am really excited for you. Hoping everything goes super smooth. 🙂

  3. Lise August 19, 2013 at 15:29 #

    It won’t be long now! Even though it feels like forever…I had my daughter two days after I lost the mucus plug so I’m optimistic! I think ( hope) your mother is right 🙂

  4. missohkay August 19, 2013 at 15:35 #

    Love ya, Mo. Maybe poopik turns into an eject button at the end? B5 could just shoot out & Shmerson could catch her and cut the parachute cord. That would be way cooler than pushing. Either way, you will be great. ❤

  5. theyellowblanket August 19, 2013 at 15:59 #

    Oh, Mo. I feel you SO MUCH on the “What happens if everything goes right” thing. I am excited about my baby boy 95 percent of the time, but 5 percent of the time (probably more than that) I’m like, HOLY FUCK. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH A BABY?!!?!? You and little B5 will do great! I hope she comes out soon, and I think that losing your mucous plug doesn’t indicate that you’ll go to 42 weeks. But what do I know? I’m not Russian!

  6. Erin August 19, 2013 at 16:11 #

    I was diagnosed with PTSD after the circumstances of delivering my first and remember toward the end with my other 2 my anxiety of just needing my baby here, on the outside, and healthy. People kept telling me how it wouldn’t be long, but every minute felt like hours and every day like months because I was just waiting for the shit to hit the fan. I had daydreams about using knitting needles to break my own water thinking, “this will make them take this baby out!” I (obviously) did not take such a drastic step, but that is how crazy I got toward the end so I think you are doing remarkably well all things considered. I am thinking of you guys and checking in all the time to get the healthy mommy/healthy baby news that I know is just around the corner. While it was a very stressful process for me, I did end up with 3 healthy kids and I believe that your healthy baby is coming home soon too

  7. KeAnne August 19, 2013 at 16:28 #

    42 weeks? Oh he’s funny. Regular comedian that one. Thinking of you and hoping B5 is here SOON!

  8. SRB August 19, 2013 at 19:33 #

    Oh man… 42 weeks is NOT a funny joke, dude. Know your audience!

    I’m going to go with your mom on this one. Wednesday sounds like a great day to have a baby. Come ooooooon B5. I want to see your squished up face, m’kay?

  9. kate August 19, 2013 at 19:41 #

    Argh. They’re not inducing you at 39 weeks? I had GD too and the only good thing about it was that they induced me two days before my due date.

    • Mo August 19, 2013 at 19:51 #

      So far no induction talk. She’s measuring on track and my placenta looks fine… But maybe it’ll come up this week. Not sure i want an induction though, it’s a slippery slope…

  10. Newmom August 19, 2013 at 20:13 #

    I doubt they will let you go to 42 weeks! My high risk OB said if I get that far they will do a c-section (or induce) at 39 weeks.

    I’m with you on the kick counts! If I don’t feel my boy move throughout the day I have a mini panic attack!

  11. Kathy August 19, 2013 at 20:26 #

    Wednesday is my birthday too ! Sounds like a great day for a perfect daughter to be born, lol. I’m not going to say relax because I know you can’t. Waiting is the worst part for sure. Good luck with labour and delivery, you will have your baby in your arms before you know it.

  12. RelaxedNoMore August 19, 2013 at 21:58 #

    Wow, 38 weeks! Hang in there, Mo!
    I doubt they’ll let you go to 42 weeks, though. Hereabouts, they induce at 40+0 when GD is involved, if I remember correctly.
    Those worries about when everything is going right and you’ll have a real, live baby in your arms pretty soon? I had them, too, and I think every pregnant woman has them – though the extent is sure to be different for everybody.
    Wishing you the best for the remaining time and labor and delivery!

  13. nonsequiturchica August 19, 2013 at 23:39 #

    Mo you are sooooo close to meeting B5!! You can do this.

    I hope that you told the Russian to not make jokes like that!

  14. Daryl August 20, 2013 at 01:14 #

    Oh, that Russian is so not funny! You are so close, Mo! I hope your mom is right and you’re holding B5 in your arms this week!

  15. slese1014 August 20, 2013 at 04:32 #

    I would have hit the Russian for saying that…I can’t believe you’re so close!!! I hope B5 makes her appearance sooner rather than later…I just talked to my MFM and my OB about induction and if I don’t go into labor on my own before my due date, I’m to report to L&D for an induction at 7AM on my due date….I really hope this happen sooner for you 🙂

  16. pjsarecomfyn August 21, 2013 at 00:08 #

    Finish line is just ahead. Keep on going sista!

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