To Pee or Not to Pee

31 May


Me: What are you so excited about?

Me: We’re back from vacation!

Me: How is that a GOOD thing?

Me: We get to pee on stuff!

Me: Um, not quite yet.

Me: Yes! We must pee on All the Things NOW!

Me: Nope.

Me: Why not?

Me: Because we’re not sure when we ovulated. At best, it was last Thursday. At worst, it was a couple of days ago. No pee stick will give us a BFP right now.

Me: Sure it can!

Me: Explain.

Me: Because I had the “I’m preggo” feeling.

Me: Yes, but even if we are preggo, it will still take a couple of days before anything shows up. A couple of days at best. More like 5 or 6.

Me: Nope! I’ve decided we fertilized last Thursday, and there’s been a cluster of cells digging into our ute ever since.

Me: That’s impossible.

Me: I will it to be so!

Me: That won’t make any difference.

Me: I have magic pee that makes two lines appear!

Me: Nope.

Me: We MUST pee! Now!

Me: We have one solitary Rolls Royce. I will not allow you to squander it on your silliness.

Me: Please?

Me: Nope.

Me: Pretty please?

Me: Try a popsicle stick.

Me: Pretty please with a cherry on top?

Me: I don’t like cherries.

Me: You suck.

Me: You can pee on some cherries.

Me: Gross.

(I promise I will post a vacation recap tomorrow. For now, I am in tired crazy town. Welcome!)

13 Responses to “To Pee or Not to Pee”

  1. SRB May 31, 2012 at 17:00 #

    I had already decided to say “Pee on ALL THE THINGS!” before I even reached that part above. Well played!

  2. Kristin May 31, 2012 at 17:30 #

    These conversations with yourself always make me giggle. Hold out. You don’t need the stress/disappointment an early, inconclusive test will bring you.

  3. missohkay May 31, 2012 at 17:32 #

    Yay, psychic feeling! Yay, pee! And I don’t like cherries either! Hope your trip was fantabulous.

  4. pjsarecomfyn May 31, 2012 at 17:52 #

    Just don’t pee on a bush outside, pretty sure that is cause for arrest. Well let’s hope your other self lets you pee on it soon.

  5. Rebecca Pallack (@RPallack) May 31, 2012 at 19:12 #

    I love these conversations that you have with yourself. Very funny. Glad I’m not the only one that does that in my head.

  6. Mina @ Fertility Doll May 31, 2012 at 19:15 #

    I love your self conversations! I vote save the Rolls Royce.

  7. teejay May 31, 2012 at 19:57 #

    So glad you are back and I can’t wait to read about your vacation! I will vote for you to NOT pee on any sticks right now…maybe in a few days. I’m impressed with the special feeling you have so hopefully by waiting a few days you can get a very accurate result on a non-rolls royce stick. Just my 2 cents. And if you DO decide to pee, please post immediately! Welcome home!

  8. Cristy May 31, 2012 at 19:57 #

    Forget battle between the body and soul, this is battle between the Moes! No votes on which direction to go, but I will say that my fingers and toes are crossed and I’m hoping for this cycle. In the meantime, hoping you don’t drive yourself too crazy.

  9. Stinky Weaselteats June 1, 2012 at 01:01 #

    I love your conversations with yourself! And loved the addendum (which I got first, since I read your blog through my inbox

  10. slcurwin June 1, 2012 at 04:37 #

    how do you not like cherries? is this an “all cherries” thing or just maraschino cherries? Because I wouldn’t blame you for that.

  11. Emily @ablanket2keep June 2, 2012 at 00:23 #

    Love ❤

  12. Kat June 3, 2012 at 06:02 #

    I love your blog. You have an amazing ability to put infertility into words, I find myself wanting to read more and cheering wholeheartedly for someone I don’t know. I hope and I pray that your dream of having a baby comes true cause based solely on reading your blog it’s pretty obvious that you would be an awesome mom.


  1. Disconnect « Infertile First Mom - June 3, 2012

    […] scenarios, I try to reign in the hope.  The following conversation in my head is inspired by Mo’s frequently familiar self talk posts.  We all have them and can relate on so many levels.  Here’s how it goes… in […]

Show some love, comment-style

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: