Second Verse – (Pretty Much) Same as the First

26 Apr

So we went in for our second opinion yesterday, and Dr. Second Opinion: I officially re-dub thee Dr. Sunshine!

Seriously, the guy was AWESOME. If he didn’t practice over an hour away from here I would transfer.

It’s not that I don’t like the Russian. But THIS GUY, seriously. Is it possible to have a completely non-sexual crush on a 70-ish year old doctor strictly because of his awesome bedside manner?

Evidence of Dr. Sunshine’s awesomeness:

  • When recounting my story, and saying my water broke at 22.5 weeks, he sighed and said “just shy of the promised land” yep. You get it. *swoon*
  • When I started conversing with him in Infertile-speak, or in other words, giving him terms and information no normal woman would know, rather than looking at me strangely, he was freaking impressed. Loved that.
  • He started talking about “our next steps” then caught himself, and said: “Oh, right, you live more than an hour away. I don’t want you making that drive all the time.” Then he helped me figure out a way to tell the Russian what he said without actually telling the Russian that I went for a second opinion, so as not to hurt his feelings.
  • When I told him this is our last shot as far as I’m concerned, he yelled at me, saying: “Don’t say that, you WILL have a baby. I can tell what kind of woman you are. You’re way too strong to give up, and there’s no reason why this won’t work out.”
  • Finally, and this was my favorite part – the man gave me his personal cell phone number and offered to be my “Phone Friend” whenever I had a question.


Also, nothing he said really contradicted the Russian, and he agreed that the Russian is a good doctor and there’s no reason for me to leave him.

Wow, I feel like I totally just had an affair on my doctor. Ahh well.

As for what happened, he went into a bit more detail, from a different perspective. He said we’ll never know for sure what happened, and it could have been contractions, it could have been the cerclage failing, or it could have been the cerclage itself. We’ll never really know.

So, Dr. Sunshine’s recommendations:

  1. Slight medication change for the first trimester, and progesterone shots starting at 14 weeks (that’s to keep any contractions at bay).
  2. Cerclage at 12 weeks, same stitch as the Russian recommends.
  3. Bed rest, of course.
  4. He sent me in to get my glucose levels tested and my TSH tested again, just in case.
  5. He convinced me to skip the HSG, because he too doesn’t see a need for it, and two docs saying not to have that painful bit of hell is enough for me.
  6. As far as he’s concerned, we can jump in again right away.

So basically, not so different from the Russian’s prognosis.

Another thing that came up was a bit of a validation for me. He pretty much confirmed that they effed up my first D&C and that’s where all the problems most likely started. No point in getting angry about it all over again. But finally a doctor confirms what I’ve been saying all along.

Shmerson and I left the appointment feeling hopeful.

I can’t say the fear has disappeared. I don’t think it ever will. But a bit of hope creeped in thanks to Dr. Sunshine, my new Phone Friend.

AF should show her face in a couple of weeks, and then, we hold our breath and jump in.

Holy crap.

30 Responses to “Second Verse – (Pretty Much) Same as the First”

  1. mrs. brightside April 26, 2012 at 18:35 #

    holy crap, i love that man. i’m so glad you got that peace of mind heading back into the fire, and now you have a second opinion available to you any time you need it, should you ever have doubts along your next steps. can he be my phone friend too??? 🙂

  2. beruriah April 26, 2012 at 18:36 #

    So glad you got confirmation that this new plan is a good one, but am sorry you can’t go with this doctor. I am THRILLED that you’re going to be getting progesterone shots.

    Wow. I wasn’t reading you back when you had the D&C. I wish none of this were necessary, but I’m so so hopeful that you’ve got a great plan.

  3. missohkay April 26, 2012 at 18:36 #

    Now I love Dr Sunshine too! Maybe he’d just let you and Shmerson move in rather than limiting himself to a phone buddy? Seriously, though, I’m glad it went well and that hope springs eternal. Scary stupid hope.

    • Mo April 26, 2012 at 19:49 #

      Oh I would totally do that if I didn’t love our balcony so much. 🙂

  4. SRB April 26, 2012 at 18:46 #

    Phew! Glad to hear that everyone is on more or less the same page. And man alive, a good bedside manner makes all the difference in the world. I cried at the end of my first appt with our RE and thanked her for actually *listening* to me. Simple kindness can rekindle hope.

  5. Laura April 26, 2012 at 18:55 #

    I think I have a crush on your Dr. Sunshine too! So glad you had such a hopeful appointment! Wishing you the best in the cycle to come.

  6. Cristy April 26, 2012 at 18:55 #

    Can I steal him? Everything about this man screams awesome doctor. Add in the fact you have his contact information and wow!

    I’m glad that you have 2 doctors that are in agreement with how to proceed. It means that you’ve got a solid plan. Now for AF and then the digit crossing begins!

  7. EB April 26, 2012 at 19:07 #

    I think your feelings are totally natural. I had similar feelings about my new OB. And she’s a she! All I needed was for someone to take me seriously and not respond to me with explaining ovulation and how progesterone works in the body. And then she went over the top by talking with me for a long time about my diagnosis, and laying down a plan for when I can get pregnant (and keep it) again. I love that he gave you his phone number.

  8. Erin April 26, 2012 at 19:15 #

    That’s so reassuring! I need to find a doc like Dr. Sunshine. 🙂

  9. peach April 26, 2012 at 19:46 #

    Wow, he sounds like a lovely person. And he offered to be your phone friend?! Amazing. I wish you the best…
    I’ve been meaning to ask, whatever happened to your friend at Eggs in a Row, I’ve missed her.

    • Mo April 26, 2012 at 19:48 #

      Hi Peach!
      Eggs had to take her blog offline because of some family drama, but she’s doing ok. She’s working on starting up a new space and I’ll announce that here as soon as it happens. I’ll let her know you checked in.

  10. nonsequiturchica April 26, 2012 at 19:49 #

    I’m so glad that you cheated on the Russian to see Dr. Sunshine. I can’t believe that he gave you his cell phone- that’s awesome!

  11. robin April 26, 2012 at 19:55 #

    Dr. Sunshine sounds amazing! I’m so glad he put your mind at ease. At least, as at ease as possible, considering what you’ve been through and what you’re gearing up for again.

  12. Coco April 26, 2012 at 20:24 #

    Holy crap! I have a crush on that doctor too! I totally started tearing up when reading what he said to you. SO AWESOME to have a doctor actually “get it” and give a crap! And to give you his number? Beyond amazing! I had a really good OB once, not that good, but he was in his 70’s as well, and he used to pat my tummy during/after an internal exam and murmur “beautiful, beautiful.” Far from being creepy, it was just a cute little old man thing. I don’t know. I miss my doctor thinking my junk is beautiful. My current OB is more along the lines of “you’ve seen one, you’ve seen ’em all.” LOL.

  13. me0me April 26, 2012 at 20:51 #

    OK. I like bunnies. Much more than cats. But those pics are AWESOME.

    I totally condone your one-afternoon-stand. It sounds like it did exactly what Dan Savage would say monogamishness should do to a relationship – give you the spark you need to feel good with your primary doctor!

  14. Courtney April 26, 2012 at 21:39 #

    I have a crush on my OB. And it’s no secret – my DH knows. ;). How can we not crush on wonderful, sensitive people?

    Great news all around! There is nothing like validation!

  15. Heather April 26, 2012 at 21:45 #

    I’m glad the appointment went so well, and I especially liked the pictures of the adorable cats you had to go with it. Good luck for this next step!

  16. Amy April 26, 2012 at 21:47 #

    Yay! We are going to have an affair on our doc at the end of next month (provided we’re not pg), and pretty much expect it will chase us to leave him. The new clinic will be a couple of hours away, and may require monitoring be done by current doc, so we won’t break up unless there’s a really awesome backup plan for monitoring.

    It’s scary and exciting at the same time. And yes, hopeful, too (even though we have no guarantee they won’t also recommend donor eggs, which would be crushing).

  17. TeeJay April 26, 2012 at 22:19 #

    I now have Henry the VIII in my head thanks to your title. 🙂 I’m glad you went for the 2nd opinion, it sounds like you are in good hands with the Russian, and a few tweaks to your treatment. You have every reason to be hopeful and I’m glad that (at least for now) you are allowing yourself to hope again. I’m sure that once you are back on the train, you will have fear and anxiety but for now, relish in the hope. And oh my gosh, how cool would it be if we were to be pregnant at the same time? Seriously, though…I’m really happy that you like this doctor and that he let you have his number. That is freaking awesome! So now we wait for AF to show and then we can be here with you through what is sure to be a scary but (hopefully) fun and rewarding journey.

  18. Jem April 26, 2012 at 22:59 #

    What a lovely doctor! Sounds like you have things covered. Please also get your vitamin D checked.

    Hugs, Jem

  19. Rebecca Pallack (@RPallack) April 26, 2012 at 23:25 #

    Well that seems like a bit of sunshine in there. Don’t give up and keep trying.

  20. Esperanza April 27, 2012 at 01:30 #

    Dr. Sunshine sounds dreamy. Seriously, so glad you got to see him. And so glad he put your mind at ease about past decisions and future plans. Thinking of you now and always.

  21. Lala April 27, 2012 at 04:26 #

    The doc sounds A-MA-ZING. So cool and I’m so hopeful for you and Shmerson!

  22. Emily @ablanket2keep April 27, 2012 at 05:10 #

    He is just awesome! So glad you had a great second oppinion and you seem to really have a plan! Is it ok that I am getting really excited for you?

  23. St. Elsewhere April 27, 2012 at 06:02 #

    I love Dr. Sunshine, and since he is saying the same things as Le Russian, is such a relief for me.

    You know, the fact that you were able to use those technical terms with the doc and he was impressed rather than giving you those strange looks , which I have sometimes received is such a welcome break!

    And well, the fact that he confirmed to you what you were saying all along, yeah that is good too.

    Jump on the wagon as soon as Affycat shows up on your door!

    P.S. He gave you his phone number? Nice doctor by all standards…

  24. jjiraffe April 27, 2012 at 08:37 #

    Yay Dr. Sunshine!! So glad he was so hopeful and validating 🙂

    Those cats are rad.

  25. marwil April 27, 2012 at 11:58 #

    Holy crap indeed! Hope is a wonderful and scary thing. I’m glad both the doctors are on the same page so you get the best care possible.

  26. Flowergirl April 27, 2012 at 20:59 #

    OMG, he has made me tear up. Think I might fly over just to have an appointment with him.

    Best wishes
    FG x

  27. Stephanie April 28, 2012 at 03:55 #

    I think I love him too. I hope, hope, hope for you.

  28. Alissa April 29, 2012 at 01:25 #

    I’m so happy you got some confirmation hon. It sounds like you have two great doctors on your side and you have a good shot. I am happy to know some of the positivity is leaking back in. You deserve to have some hope to hold on to.

Show some love, comment-style

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: