Happy Pills, Pee Sticks, Babies, Crazies and General Randomness

26 Jul

So – I am absolutely exhausted, but I figured it was time for an update. So pardon me for the bullet points, but this is all a random jumble.

  • I resisted POAS the last couple of days (thanks for everybody’s feedback, BTW!). Today I saw the coveted EWCM so I ended up doing it, just because it’s only CD 14 and I haven’t O’d this early since I started tracking. It was positive, but one of those half dark lines, so I’m not completely sure where that falls. Even if it counts as negative, it means I’m close. Which makes me really happy. First, because I have no idea what side I’m popping from which will make resisting baby making much easier, and second, I think the progesterone, as torturous as it was, did some good stuff for my cycle. We’ll see on what CD the red lady shows up. I’m curious.
  • Dr. Happy Pills changed around my dosage last week, and that’s doing good things as well. He added Ati.van to the mix, and upped my zo.loft. It makes me hella tired, which is good, because I’m actually going to bed before 4am most nights. Downside: I don’t get to skype as much with my ET/PT time friends (sorry Marie!). Upside: I’m actually conscious before noon most days, and functioning waaaay better.
  • My house has become a train station. Ever since we advertised the place as being for sale, my phone has been ringing off the hook and we have people here all hours of the day. I would restrict it, but I want to get this place sold. The sooner we sell it, the sooner we’re in our new place. And I want to be in our new place. It’s time I get to some serious nesting action.
  • I’m suffering from a serious case of Harry Potter withdrawal. I had spent the last couple of weeks writing that series of columns for keypulp, and now I’m in need of a fix. I’ll probably end up doing a review of the last film after all. As soon as I have time to breathe. Which I don’t right now.
  • I went to visit PM today and got to hold the little one for like half an hour as he slept. I think it was the most at peace I’ve felt in a very long time. I have a lot more to say about what I’m learning from her, but that’s for a longer, less rambly post. But in general, that kid is just so precious. I didn’t imagine I’d love him as much as I do. But I do. It’s not that I’m not a bit envious, because I am. But my awe and my love for PM and the kid completely overshadow that. I’m incredibly grateful. It’s teaching me a lot about this journey.
  • I’m looking for a full time job, outside of the house, because this whole work at home thing does not do good things for my psyche. So far, no luck, because there are very few content-driven companies in my city and I don’t want to commute. The funny thing is that the more I look for full time work, the more freelance jobs fall in my lap, plus a possible opportunity to actually get a feature film made just fell from the sky last week (I won’t talk about it more now – it’s still too early and the status of the project is up in the air, so I don’t want to jinx it). The Flying Spaghetti Monster has decided to lob meatballs at me or something. Things are WEIRD.
  • The thing is, this is the busiest I’ve been in MONTHS. As crazy as things are, I’m loving every minute, and it makes for a great distraction. I only find myself getting a case of the baby-crazies about once a day, which is NOTHING compared to a few weeks ago. There’s apparently something to this busy thing. I think I’m gonna keep going at it. Having a life – it’s not just for fertiles anymore!
  • Shmerson and I went in for karyotyping today. It will take a couple of months before we actually get results, but I’m happy we have one more test under our belt.
That’s about it. I’m going to bed, because I have yet another train station day tomorrow. Wed. is our lap consult, so I’ll update you guys with news on that. In the meantime, fare thee well. I am, to quote Shmerson: collapsedizing.

15 Responses to “Happy Pills, Pee Sticks, Babies, Crazies and General Randomness”

  1. Sherrie July 26, 2011 at 01:31 #

    🙂 sounds like you have a lot of exciting things in the pipeline!!! 🙂 very excited for u Hun!! And I hope your cycles have decided to comply!! It’d be great to have them cooperating for the future!! 😀
    Best of luck for all your endeavors!! 🙂

    • Mo July 26, 2011 at 22:57 #

      thanks hon! 🙂

  2. Marie July 26, 2011 at 02:07 #

    I like collapsedizing.

    • Mo July 26, 2011 at 22:57 #

      As do I. On a daily basis. 🙂

  3. Julia July 26, 2011 at 02:11 #

    Reg: the OPK’s- They are positive when they are as dark or darker than the control line. However, if you notice they are getting darker- go for it!!!

  4. missohkay July 26, 2011 at 02:27 #

    Oh that flying Spaghetti Monster… You never know what He (She?) is up to.

  5. chon July 26, 2011 at 02:33 #

    Sounds like you have some good plans in place my POAS friend 🙂 I think when we are busy at work in makes a huge difference. Less time to obsess on the maybe’s of life. Feature film – can I be in it????

    • Mo July 26, 2011 at 22:58 #

      Shhhh…. No jinxing! 😛

  6. Christina July 26, 2011 at 02:55 #

    Wow… I’m exhausted just from reading that! Seems like a lot of good things are happening in your life right now. I’m glad you are taking the time to enjoy and experience them. It’s crazy that life happens when one’s not shut up in a bathroom analyzing urine-soaked sticks, CM, and every twinge and tweak of your body. Plus, staying busy makes the time go by faster!

    • Mo July 26, 2011 at 22:58 #

      totally! having a life that doesn’t rely on staring at urine-soaked sticks is rather awesome. 🙂

  7. Esperanza July 26, 2011 at 05:15 #

    Having a life – it’s not just for fertiles anymore! – What a great line. I love it. And I’m so excited that things are happening for you. Positive, productive things. That is great to hear. Can’t wait to learn more about what PM and her babe are teaching you. I’m intrigued…

  8. starfishkittydreams July 26, 2011 at 08:35 #

    “Having a life – it’s not just for fertiles anymore!” I couldn’t agree more! I love hearing how busy you are and enjoying the activity.

    You can’t go wrong with getting busy around CD 14. In my experience, it’s definitely better to be early and doing some extra never hurts.

    I bet your karyotyping results will come back sooner. I think it should only take about 1-2 months.

    • Mo July 26, 2011 at 22:59 #

      Well, we’re not getting busy until a decision is made about ole’ righty, but it is nice to know that my body is (somewhat) functional. 🙂

  9. Kristen July 27, 2011 at 01:58 #

    Glad you’re busy and you sound good. I love your line: “Having a life: it’s not just for fertiles anymore.” I’ve been thinking a lot about that…for example all my literary writing has really been on hold for so long, and I have a slow work week this week (I freelance too) and the idea popped into my head I could start work on a book I’m got mapped out in my head (and on paper). But then I think not while I’m in the 2WW. But then I think why not, right? I’m sick of everything being on hold…

  10. Port of Indecision July 27, 2011 at 05:54 #

    Yay for new house! Hope your current place sells soon. Buying and selling dwellings is a PITA.

    It must be bulleted list time of year on the blogs or something. I swear, everyone is doing random bulleted lists of all the unrelated shit banging around in their brains. I love it.

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