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Two Degrees! Seriously!

5 Jan

Squish and I have this running joke – whenever I do something or say something ridiculously stupid she exasperatedly yells “Two degrees! You have two degrees!”.

Whenever I do something awesome well, she says the same. 🙂

Today in therapy I had a lightbulb moment – one that should have been so incredibly obvious that while having it I saw squish materialize in front of me yelling “Two degrees!!!”.

Then of course when I called to tell her about it she said the same.

Please be patient with me while I try to make sense of this – it seems the simplest things are sometimes the hardest to explain. Ah I know! I’ll write it out as a dialogue! yay! my favorite thing to do ever! (keep in mind this isn’t even close to word for word – just the basic spirit of the conversation)

Therapist: So why exactly are you insisting on telling your dad now?

Me: Well – I have to do it because I feel like I won’t be able to move forward without that.

Therapist: And do you know already how you’re going to make a living?

Me: um no – but…

Therapist: So you go and tell him, then he shuts you down because you don’t have a back up plan, and then you’re back to square one – having your dad control your decisions.

Me: oh, yeah. right. There’s that.

Therapist: so why don’t you figure out how to make a living first? BEFORE YOU TELL HIM.

Me: well, because I don’t know what I want to do

Therapist: you seem to have plenty of ideas

Me: yes – but I’m afraid of making the wrong decision.  And I don’t know where to start.

Therapist: Why are you so afraid?

Me: Because I feel like every decision I make is the end-all, be-all, final decision about my career and path in life.

Therapist: But you know it doesn’t have to be

Me: I guess…

Therapist: Here’s an idea: Why don’t you and Shmerson sit down together and have a conversation, where you figure out how much money you need per month to live comfortably and support a baby.

Me: ok…

Therapist: Then, you divide that amount between the two of you, and then you know how much money you are responsible to bring in every month.

Me: uh huh.

Therapist: And then you go out, and figure out how to bring in that money, while leaving time for your creative pursuits, or finding a way to make that part of how you make a living.

Me: Wait – wait – so I don’t have to make a huge life decision?

Therapist: nope. You don’t. You can take the time to make it, and just, you know, make a living doing whatever in the meantime.

****the skies open up – angels sing, the sun shines, and squish comes down and yells “Two degrees!! Seriously!” ****

Me: OMG!!! I Get it! If you want to jump to huge heights, you need to build up some steady ground first!!

Therapist: Yep. That would be the healthy thing to do.

Me: Hmm. healthy. that’s a novel concept.

Therapist: So yes – you build a house brick by brick. You don’t try to put the roof on before pouring the foundation.

Imaginary Squish: TWO DEGREES! THIS WOMAN HAS TWO DEGREES!

Me: well – that simplifies things – doesn’t it?

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