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Tattoo

4 Jan

After overcoming my first bout of depression and anxiety at age 17, I went out and got a tattoo on my back. It was a faerie, and I named her “Tori”. She reminded me of the three months I spent painting through my internal crap, while blasting “boys for pele” on a loop 24-7.

I got her as a symbol of the power of starting over. As a visual bookmark that always told me “you have strength and things get better.”

I’ve been thinking of getting a second tattoo. One to commemorate my losses, but also as a second, stronger reminder of my ability to crawl out of the mud.  I’ve had a few ideas. The lamest being getting the symbol of the deathly hallows from HP on my ankle (silly I know, but harry potter has always been a great place for me to escape to when I needed a pick me up).

Still – it’s a really lame idea. And surpasses even my unusually high level of dorkiness.

Last night I thought of another idea. I thought that maybe I should get two small stars on my left ankle to represent my lost babies.

And when my “found” babies come, I would get one small flower on my right ankle for every one of them.

I like the symbolism of it – but stars and flowers seem to be a bit cliche – no?

I am an endless well of lameness, apparently.

Any ideas for symbols of the less-cheesy variety? Or am I being too hard on myself? Comment away!

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16 Responses to “Tattoo”

  1. edan January 4, 2011 at 16:27 #

    Its really really weird reading your little sissies inner thoughts on a blog.
    Did I mention its weird ? cause it is.
    Thank god youre not considring piercing places.
    btw i like the stars idea but make them happy stars

    • mommyodyssey January 4, 2011 at 16:45 #

      Sissy you are the bestest.
      How exactly do you suggest I make them “happy stars”?

  2. runnyyolk January 4, 2011 at 16:38 #

    I kind of love the idea of the Deathly Hallows… but I’m weird.

    • mommyodyssey January 4, 2011 at 16:44 #

      See – i did too, until I saw this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0VlIjXj9NA

      • slcurwin January 5, 2011 at 05:43 #

        holy frack! I want in his room! He has that damn tin lunch box I wanted.
        I still like the deathly hallows idea. I take it you have the tales of Beedle the bard?

        • mommyodyssey January 5, 2011 at 12:21 #

          But of course I do! And the hubby and I have actually had several mega-serious conversations (initiated by me of course) as to what age to introduce our future kids to the series. We have yet to come to an agreement. 🙂

          • slcurwin January 6, 2011 at 00:46 #

            I’ve already got my son watching (not that he actually cares yet…or pays much attention, but still) the first one on occation. I just point out the cute things and avoid the scary parts.

            • mommyodyssey January 6, 2011 at 01:16 #

              See – I DESPISE the movies. I keep watching them for some reason, and they are getting a bit better, but I think I will keep my kids away from the films like the plague so they don’t get spoiled. But I’m mega-hardcore when it comes to HP. I did a complete 7 day media blackout (yes, including internet!) before Deathly Hallows came out, and read for two days straight without doing anything else so as not to ruin anything. All because I accidentally found out the ending of Order of the Phoenix before finishing it, and it sucked. But I have issues. 🙂

            • slcurwin January 6, 2011 at 03:18 #

              I’m with you on the movies suck in comparison, but I love the books so much that I watch them anyways.

              • mommyodyssey January 6, 2011 at 04:03 #

                This conversation just inspired a new post! Go forth! Read! Mock me! 🙂

  3. me0me January 4, 2011 at 17:13 #

    This will not be surprising coming from me, but how about *not* getting a tattoo as a symbol of the fact that you now have actual control of your life and connection to your feelings and don’t really need anything to make you feel more alive?
    And if that’s going too far for you, how about treating getting a tattoo as a major decision and waiting until you’re at a more level headed place to processing it?

    • mommyodyssey January 4, 2011 at 17:19 #

      Darn you voice of reason! Darn you! 🙂

    • rolig January 8, 2011 at 12:20 #

      I agree with me0me .

  4. slcurwin January 5, 2011 at 05:45 #

    or from a tattoo lover…YAY TATTOO!!!
    But do make sure it’s one you will want for life.

  5. bodegabliss January 21, 2011 at 21:13 #

    I have wanted the same thing since my last loss in August. I had also thought of stars, but yes, they seem cliche. But I’m saying who cares to that! Hahahaha. I do like the butterfly, though. 🙂 Yay for tattoos!! I have a coupe already. Ironically, I have one on my lower arm of 3 flowers, but they represent something else for me, but could easily transfer to the 3 losses I’ve had. But no, they definitely need their own representation. For sure!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Weekly Obsession Premier: And this time – Harry Potter! « mommyodyssey - January 6, 2011

    […] Now writing all of this out kind of scares me, if I’m being honest. I mean, it is a bit much. Though I’m sure other people have done much worse. Like this guy, who I first introduced in the comments section of one of my previous posts: […]

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