Chapter 11: Breaking point

16 Dec

We move.

For about 3 days I’m starting to feel content. Picking up some of the pieces. Some. Slight optimism. But no. I’m still not doing well. Panic attacks. Insomnia.

I am not functioning. I haven’t been functioning for months.

I lost two babies. Nothing makes sense anymore.

I go to a new OBGYN. I like this guy. He’s sympathetic. he’s sweet. I think he and I will get along just fine.

Next stop: hemotologist (how the heck do you spell that?) to check why the heck this keeps on happening.

I feel better for two days.

And then – not.

Every time I scrape my way up a wall I slide right back down.

I am stuck. Everything is stuck. I am shattered.

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One Response to “Chapter 11: Breaking point”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. What Nadav Taught Me: Live Life « Mommy Odyssey - March 9, 2012

    [...] our first loss, but our first loss tossed me into a spiral. As I’ve written here before, my brain broke. Even after getting happy pills to address the problem, I still wasn’t the same person. Even [...]

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